My Last Request

Title: My Last Request

Author: _niXIAH

URL: http://winglin.net/fanfic/_niXIAH12/

Reviewer: jjwyl

`Story Title[did it catch my attention?] : -3/5

The only problem was that the title didn’t really relate to the story until the last ending. You could have added something about a request in the middle of the story, just so it connects.

`Appearance[what was my first impression? Did it catch my attention?] : -6/10

I found the poster to look a bit missy. The letterings on the poster didn’t seem to look really smooth. The poster doesn’t look like there was a lot of effort put into it. And even though you can see the words on top of the background, it’s not that great. You should have used a darker color for the font.

`Forewords[did your forewords make me wanting to read more?] : -9/10

The foreword was captivating. If I were to read your foreword, I’d continue on with the story. I only read stories that have a good foreword. If the foreword is not interesting, I skip to another story.

`Plot[was the plot cliche or was it interesting?] : -12/15.

I liked it. But there were parts when it’d be cliché. Like when Changmin was dreaming that he was in Heaven. And I don’t know why, people in stories like to die peacefully like Changmin. I thought that part was a bit cliché.

`Characterization[was I able to learn about the characters?] : -7/10

I thought you described the characters quite well. I was able to know what JunHee is a happy, bubble type of girl.

`Creativity/Originality[was it creative?] : -6/10

It’s not really creative. I think this kind of story is a bit too common. Someone has an illness that is incurable, that person falls in love, and he dies in the end. That’s the three main points of your story.

`Spelling/Grammar/Vocabulary[was I able to understand what you were trying to say?] : -11/10

I think you’re going to have to work on your grammar a bit more. I could see that you had some of the tenses mixed up and such. But the spelling and vocabulary were good.

`Flow[was it too fast or too slow to my liking?] : -7/10.

The flow was quite good, except I think you made JunHee and Changmin’s relationship a bit too fast. Try to slow down when it comes to feelings.

`Writing Style[did your writing style make it easy for me to read?] : -12/15

I liked how you added bits of a song in there. And I liked how you described things in the story.

`Overall Enjoyment[did I enjoy this story?] : -4/5

`Total : -77/100

`Bonus : -3/5

Overall Total: -80/100