Pair of Hands
Title: Pair of Hands
Author: Brightside
URL: http://www.winglin.net/fanfic/pairofhands/
Reviewer: jjwyl
`Story Title[did it catch my attention?] : -4/5
This is something I haven’t seen yet. It sounds like it has a really deep meaning to it.
`Appearance[what was my first impression? Did it catch my attention?] : -9/10
The background and poster look amazing. I just took a mark off cause of the blue colored font. It really did not match the appearance at all. You should go for a darker color next time to fit in with the poster.
`Forewords[did your forewords make me wanting to read more?] : -9/10
Even though it was a bit too short, I was attracted to it. It did made me want to read more and continue to see what happens to Dia.
`Plot[was the plot cliche or was it interesting?] : -12/15.
I didn’t really find this plot cliché, but more of unique. But because it’s still not finished, I can’t really say much about the plot.
`Characterization[was I able to learn about the characters?] : -7/10
There wasn’t much information on the characters. Most of the information was from Dia. But I didn’t really quite see the type of person the other characters were.
`Creativity/Originality[was it creative?] : -8/10
I found that ‘hands’ appeared a lot in this story. It was quite creative. It’s very rare that people would use ‘hands’ as their main topic.
`Spelling/Grammar/Vocabulary[was I able to understand what you were trying to say?] : -5/10
I spotted quite a number of grammar mistakes. You put a past tense word with a present tense. It doesn’t work. For example, “All she wanted is to save the person from falling into the big dark hole.” You should put WAS instead of IS. It would make more sense that way. But your spelling is awesome.
`Flow[was it too fast or too slow to my liking?] : -7/10.
I can’t really tell because it’s not finished. But so far, maybe take things a bit slower. The beginning was a bit rushed.
`Writing Style[did your writing style make it easy for me to read?] : -13/15
Though there were a lot of grammar mistakes, I thought your style was quite good. It didn’t look messy at all. But I would recommend making the paragraphs longer and having less single sentences.
`Overall Enjoyment[did I enjoy this story?] : -2/5
`Total : -76/100
`Bonus : -1/5
Overall Total: -77/100
Author: Brightside
URL: http://www.winglin.net/fanfic/pairofhands/
Reviewer: jjwyl
`Story Title[did it catch my attention?] : -4/5
This is something I haven’t seen yet. It sounds like it has a really deep meaning to it.
`Appearance[what was my first impression? Did it catch my attention?] : -9/10
The background and poster look amazing. I just took a mark off cause of the blue colored font. It really did not match the appearance at all. You should go for a darker color next time to fit in with the poster.
`Forewords[did your forewords make me wanting to read more?] : -9/10
Even though it was a bit too short, I was attracted to it. It did made me want to read more and continue to see what happens to Dia.
`Plot[was the plot cliche or was it interesting?] : -12/15.
I didn’t really find this plot cliché, but more of unique. But because it’s still not finished, I can’t really say much about the plot.
`Characterization[was I able to learn about the characters?] : -7/10
There wasn’t much information on the characters. Most of the information was from Dia. But I didn’t really quite see the type of person the other characters were.
`Creativity/Originality[was it creative?] : -8/10
I found that ‘hands’ appeared a lot in this story. It was quite creative. It’s very rare that people would use ‘hands’ as their main topic.
`Spelling/Grammar/Vocabulary[was I able to understand what you were trying to say?] : -5/10
I spotted quite a number of grammar mistakes. You put a past tense word with a present tense. It doesn’t work. For example, “All she wanted is to save the person from falling into the big dark hole.” You should put WAS instead of IS. It would make more sense that way. But your spelling is awesome.
`Flow[was it too fast or too slow to my liking?] : -7/10.
I can’t really tell because it’s not finished. But so far, maybe take things a bit slower. The beginning was a bit rushed.
`Writing Style[did your writing style make it easy for me to read?] : -13/15
Though there were a lot of grammar mistakes, I thought your style was quite good. It didn’t look messy at all. But I would recommend making the paragraphs longer and having less single sentences.
`Overall Enjoyment[did I enjoy this story?] : -2/5
`Total : -76/100
`Bonus : -1/5
Overall Total: -77/100
posted by my sensation at
5:35 PM
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