Letting Go

Title: Letting Go

Author: reiko

URL: http://www.winglin.net/fanfic/reiko10/

Reviewer: jjwyl

`Story Title[did it catch my attention?] : -4/5

It did catch my attention because it had the words complete in it and I usually only read stories that are completed. I don’t like the suspense of the ends of each chapter.

`Appearance[what was my first impression? Did it catch my attention?] : -7/10

Nice poster and great colors that match with it. The colors match with the story itself but the poster doesn’t really seem to bring out the sadness that was written in the story. The words sometimes blended in with the poster so it was a bit hard to read.

`Forewords[did your forewords make me wanting to read more?] : -2.5/10

Sorry for the really low score here, but it’s because you have no information on the story at all. When I look at stories, I usually look at the foreword first because the foreword is what catches my attention. If the foreword is no good, I skip that story and go straight to a different story. When you write a foreword, make sure it isn’t so long that it tells us everything about the story.

`Plot[was the plot cliche or was it interesting?] : -8/15.

It’s cliché because the girl dies. There’s too many stories out there that has the main character dying in the end.

`Characterization[was I able to learn about the characters?] : -6/10

I wasn’t really quite able to feel what type of person Jaebeom and Haneul were. I know they were in love, but that’s about it. There weren’t much described.

`Creativity/Originality[was it creative?] : -6/10

Not very creative or original. There’s a lot of stories out there that has one of the main characters dying and leaving the other one to live.

`Spelling/Grammar/Vocabulary[was I able to understand what you were trying to say?] : -5/10

There were quite a few grammar mistakes in your story. You kept on changing the tenses from present to past and then back to past. Stick with one tense.

Chapter 1: “the first thing that I have noticed when I enter this awkward room was her.” It should have been written like this “the first thing I noticed when I entered the awkward room was her.”

Chapter 2: “So How’s your sleep?” Was it supposed to be “So, how was your sleep?”

`Flow[was it too fast or too slow to my liking?] : -5.5/10.

I think the flow was a bit rushed. Even their meeting was rushed. When I was reading your story, I thought the story ended a bit too fast. You weren’t really able to show the deepness of their love. And during those few months that passed, you should have written something about them. A few months is enough time to have something major happen.

`Writing Style[did your writing style make it easy for me to read?] : -13/15

Your overall writing style is pretty good. But the one thing you should work on would be to space out your sentences. If you’re writing plain sentences without anyone speaking, write them so that they become a paragraph. But if you are writing speaking sentences, put them on one single line.

`Overall Enjoyment[did I enjoy this story?] : -1/5

`Total : -58/100

`Bonus : -1/5

It’s for Jaebeom.

Overall Total: -59/100