Shinning Star

"SHINING STAR"
http://www.winglin.net/fanfic/Minhee/
Review by: musicbeat



Story Title[did it catch my attention?] : 5/5

Yes, it did catch my attention.

`Appearance[what was my first impression? Did it catch my attention?] : 8/10

My first reaction when I first saw the story was it would revolve around the entertainment business but it turns out to be about high school love.

`Forewords[did your forewords make me wanting to read more?] : 6/10

In my opinion, it lacked the elements I thought would be good to attract more readers. You described the main characters but the story remains a mystery. Maybe it was your style for the readers to look on the next chapter.

`Plot[was the plot cliche or was it interesting?] : 10/15

The plot is not as original that I thought it would be. At first, it was going smoothly but when I was near the end it all jumped to one single event that changed everything. The story did not develop properly. It left me hanging at the moment and question why did it end so fast. I wished you have let the events unravel themselves naturally without skipping a lot of "supposed to be" the most exciting events of the story. My single advice for you is "don't rush..." because if you rush the story especially near the end, it would produce bad results just like what happened here. It seemed to unreal to end a relationship that fast without some resolution between Yoona and the reader, and the reader and Yesung.

`Characterization[was I able to learn about the characters?] : 9/10
Since there were few characters, everyone is easy to pinpoint who is who. They are characterized well and simple.

`Creativity/Originality[was it creative?] : 7/10
I have read a lot of stories, especially fanfics and based on my observation I have read this kind of plot. There was nothing new that I haven't read before. Sometimes it's nice to spice up things a bit and maybe you can add things based on your experiences.

`Spelling/Grammar/Vocabulary[was I able to understand what you were trying to say?] : 7/10

You keep forgetting the difference between the singular and plural nouns and also whenever you use present tenses, there are some grammatical errors. I suggest you brush up on your English and re-check your drafts. Even though there are errors here and there, the story is easy to understand so don't worry much it but it would be nice if you improve on it.

`Flow[was it too fast or too slow to my liking?] : 8/10

Just like what I said before, you skipped a lot of things that made it disappointing in the end. The flow was a little fast for the characters' feelings to develop. I was hoping more events would have happened in the story.

`Writing Style[did your writing style make it easy for me to read?] : 14/15

Your writing style is good. It wasn't hard to analyze what was happening in the story.

`Overall Enjoyment[did I enjoy this story?] : 3/5

I did enjoy the story but the feeling I had at the end was disappointing. I was hoping for a proper ending for both of the characters.
`Total : 77/100

`Bonus : 3/5

For your passion and effort making fanfics on your spare time.

Overall Total: 80/100
I'm not saying that the story is bad or anything. It was just disappointing that it ended too fast for my liking. Please look at my judging on the brighter side. I'm just telling you that there are flaws in this story and I hope you could improve on that. May this review helped you in anyway! Good Luck in your upcoming Projects!!!! Please don't be mad.